Wish corruptor

granted, but afterwards get arrested for robbing the bank of england and you get sentanced to 25 years inprisonment.

I wish McDs delivered.

 

Granted. I show up at your house wth a nice delivery of used fryer oil and eat all your food and mess up your house and use all your toilet paper and step on your dog.

I wish that I could find a roomate for this apartment I want to get.

 

granted, its me after you trashed my house I move in with you and I eat all your food, never do the laundry or clean a thing and step on your cat.

I wish I had a nice new pair of shoes that fit

 

Granted, they're super awesome and you spent your entire savings on them and they fit me wonderfully.

I wish I had better hours at work.

 

Granted. Your boss becomes enamoured of you and let you choose your hours after he's done the schedule for everyone else. Learning at the last minute that they must work all the bad shifts, your coworkers beguin to hate you. Threy plot their revenge and before long, you're running from a lynching posse.

I wich I had my teacher's license now instead of waiting 4 years.

 

My boss is my stepmother, haha.

 

what I said still stand. It's only even more corrupted than I thought it would be.

 

Granted, you get stuck in my classroom teaching a bunch of three year olds.

I wish I wasn't bored.

 

Granted: Tom Clancyesque men in black kidnap you by mistake. Because it's a super-secret clandestine mission, they kill you and dump your body in the Hudson River.


I wish my mother-in-law lived in L.A., instead of in my house.

 

Granted, then you house burns down and you have to move to LA and live with her in her house.

I wish people would start using IRC again.

 

Granted, but everyone mistakes it for Irish Radish Chalupas, which as you can guess isn't a good food. Everyone on earth gets horrible diarrhea and the world is flooded with...

I wish my head would shave itself instead of me having to do it.

 

Granted,,, Your wife buys an Epilady and after 2-3 uses you never have to worry about hair again... anywhere...

I wish that everyone around told the truth

 

OUCH!! That's just Wrong. But since I'm not married, no problem. Whew!

Granted, but as the movie said "You can't HANDLE the Truth!"

I wish I had the desire to really quit smoking.

 

granted you give up smoking, but take up injecting heroin.

i wish i could cast spells in real life

 

GRANTED: You can cast spells of all sorts in real life, but you never cast any of them right, even the most simple of spells, where spell effects are unpredictable, unreliable and always cause indeterminately random wrong events and unexpected effects.

I wish I had a cold 12-ounce beer to drink.