Wish corruptor

...now this is going to be cheesy...

Granted. You had a great time at the pub and were so drunk that you couldn't tell
the difference between your mother and Cujo.

Not!




I wish I could come up with better wish corruptions.

 

granted, you come up with such cruel, cutting remarks they leave everyone horrified. No one will ever speak to you again for fear of your replies. You are then banned from Co8 and therefore can not download any further mods or updates.


I wish my dog wouldnt eat everything he see's. (and i mean everything, last week he ate a small bush)

 

Granted: Your dog only savors human flesh. After devouring several children, he's destroyed; you're lynched by angry parents before the police can arrest you.

I wish I had a Porsche 911 Turbo.

 

Granted: But it was totalled just before you wished for it and the bloody, mangled corpse is still in the driver's seat. Well, what's left of it.

I wish I could find the hiking boots I want.

 

granted, but the hiking boots are on the mangled corpse that is still sitting in the drivers seat.

have fun getting them off.

i wish i was fit

 

Granted, but you're now under constant public scrutiny and have to strive to keep your body in perfect condition or face social ridicule and humiliation. Furthermore, cheesecake is forever off limits to you, whether you remain fit or not, oooooooh.

I wish I could be as wise as Socrates.

-Grey

 

granted, you are found guilty of corrupting the minds of the youth and sentenced to death by drinking hemlock wine.

I wish I handn't injured myself at work today.

 

Granted: You injured someone else, grievously. His lawyers will contact you shortly.


I wish I could fly like Superman.

 

Granted: You can fly like Superman, but you have no sense of direction and permanently continue to fly in line with the poles about the Earth.

I wish there would be world peace.

 

Granted. Each and every person suddenly starts to care for everyone, to *feel*, actually feeling other people's pain and distress and joy and caring for strangers as much as for their kids and loved ones, and no one wants to hurt anyone again - ever.

Unfortunately you wished only for world peace and not intergalactic peace, just the day before the arrival of a million Vegan Battleships full of alien colons hungry for a New World to settle on and with very little concern for indigenous lifeforms, other than reengineering their particles to suit their own needs...


(damn, hate to corrupt that wish! great topic guys...)


I wish there were new Calvin & Hobbes, Mafaldas, Seinfeld episodes, Monthy Python and Marx Brothers movies, in the spirit of the old ones of course, available and that I can enjoy. :joy:

 

granted, but you can only enjoy them after a nonstop 48 hour Woody Alen movie marathon.

I wish I could get drunk this weekend without consequences.

 

Granted: You get drunk in what is a great stupor this weekend without consequences; however - this weekend, no one else is at your house and you are alone and are by yourself, none of your friends stop by to visit nor call you, nothing is worth watching on TV, all the radio stations play music you dislike or do not care about, you find your swords and knives are all starting to oxidize and show signs of corrosion, an annoying flock of crows make noise all weekend that greatly disturbs you all weekend, in the middle of the weekend the electric transformer on the pole outside your house explodes where you and your neighbors do not have electricity for the rest of the weekend - your refridgerated food all spoils, clothes remain dirty, and you cannot take a bath or watch even worthless tv or listen to music you do not like.

I wish to win the mega lottery.

 

LOL, I'm still drinking and my car is still working :drunk: :tombstone

 

Granted, you possess the sole winning ticket to the mega lottery. Winning the lottery is just as you dreamed; you've invested it properly to make it grow, opportunities arise by the handful, each endeavor more successful than the last. Your family, both immediate and extended, is relieved of its financial burdens because of your winnings and successes, and as the years pass and the fortune grows, you wonder to yourself how this could possibly be a corrupted wish.

It's then that you realize that every last person on earth views you only in what they can get from you, what piece you're willing to give them. Even your family, both immediate and extended, has come to see you as little more than a cash bank. You see that the business partners and associates who cheered you on at every turn and every payoff, only cheered at the knowledge they could take more from you; they acted as if you were the greatest being on earth every time you sacrificed some intrinsic principle or personal ethic. In the end, you've won the mega lottery, but you've lost everything that made you, well, you.

I wish I could become a morning person, it would make my life much easier.

-Grey

 

Granted: You become a morning person. However, you learn to overly enjoy drinking coffee and you overdose from drinking too much expresso coffee.

I wish to travel about the entire world in 80 days.