A funny thread...

That first clip was from the 60's movie. The yacht became invisible or something. That second one is funny as hell.

 

Yeah, but the shark thing was amusing.

 

Sure, but it'd be even funnier if it took his leg off; blood spurting, screaming for mommy - that sort of thing. :transform

 

I love this one...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M0fWUJosjak

 

http://www.grabyournuts.com/#whitewater

Fun with kayaks & nuts.

 

funny - pitty he has such a stupid voice

 

I found this ammusing but then its taking the piss out of Christchurch High schools so it could well be a "you got to be there" joke.

LIGHT BULBS

How many christchurch high school students does it take to change a lightbulb?

Rangi Ruru - One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.

Hornby High - Two. One to change the bulb and one to figure out how to get high off the old one.

St Bedes - None. They're all too drunk to notice and even when they're sober if they spot a hole they just put their cock in it.

Girls High - One. She'll put through a call to maintenance staff because there's no way she's going to do manual labour.

Hillmorton High - None. That place looks better in the dark.

Riccarton High - Six. One to change it but only after the other five have found an interpreter to translate the English instructions.

Burnside High - Seventy six. One to change the globe. Fifty to protest the globe's right not to change and twenty five to stage a counter protest.

Christ's College - None. Those poor bastards are keeping their backs to the wall even if it means standing in the dark. "If you can't get a girl, get a Christ's boy".

Avonside Girls - Five. One to change it, two to make sure her hair ribbons are still in place and another two to make sure her bag looks cool at all times.

Linwood High - Six. Four to break into the store, one to steal the globe and one to install it.

Villa Maria - None. It is too unsafe for pregnant girls to attempt such a dangerous task.

Papanui High - Ten. One to change the bulb. One to call their dealer and eight to have a session why they wait.

Aranui High - None. Everything not welded down had been flogged long ago.

Hagley - None. Everyone is either suspended or bunking (including the teachers).

Boys High - Two, one to change the bulb and one to make the observation that it isn't half as bright as the light shining from their arses.

Marian - None. They only have to give head to the Shirley boys and it's done for them.

Shirley Boys - None. They're too busy covertly breaking the bulbs over at Marian so they can get head.

Rangiora High - None. Electricity has yet to make it out that far.

St Thomas's - Four. One to change the bulb, three to count how many times he mentions rugby and f^$%king someones mother.

St Margarets - None. The Butler can do it.

Cashmere High - None. They really can't be bothered, and there's surfing to be done.

Lincoln High - three - one to change it and two to hold the sheep still so he can stand on it

 

Star Wars rap... I hate rap, but this really cracked me
up. It's filled with offensive language so it's not
appropriate for kiddies.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdHWJtpKzI8


Another cartoon gone bad.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0P49sLoe6H8&feature=related

Remember Turkish Rambo? There also was a Turkish version of Superman.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p9oI7Fd3Uec&feature=related

.... and Star Wars

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbYczbBlatA&feature=related

 

Thanks maggit, that star wars deal cracked me up.

btw...there is an Indian version of superman on that second link, and it's pretty funny.

 

One of those Boromir Gifs...a bit small and vulgar, but the final face of Boromir worth it

 

A bit late for a nativity scene, but I almost died laughing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVZczLuoJoU

 

This is an unremarkable file inside the .mes folder.
Really.
Have fun

Code:

// QUotes uttered during the making of Temple of Elemental Evil

{0}{These are actual quotes uttered by the people who work at Troika Games. They are reproduced here entirely out of context, as they should be. Enjoy!}

{1}{It's exactly the same, only opposite.
- Steve}

{2}{I will now release you from crazy-realm. Now please don't step on my balls again.
- Tim}

{3}{Do you have any large I-fling-poos?
-Steve}

{4}{This is kind of fluffy for a fish.
-Steve}

{5}{And you looked at my groin, that's almost two.
-Steve}

{6}{I am so excited about my large tree.
-Mike}

{7}{You randomly get hairy balls and ass.
-Steve}

{8}{But somebody's *looking* for hairy balls and ass!
-Steve, moments later}

{9}{No penis, *please* no penis!
-Steve}

{10}{Please don't dance for my dog.
-Tim}

{11}{I'm gonna go over here and shoot people that aren't me.
-Tim}

{12}{If I had to choose between learning abstract higher mathematics or drawing naked people, I'd choose naked people.
-Tim}

{13}{I never realized that being on hold could be so erotic.
-Steve}

{14}{Why does it seem like I'm always going into ladies rooms?
-Tim}

{15}{Woo-hoo, I can get a prosthetic breast now!
-Steve}

{16}{You're either fucked or you're not.
-Mike}

{17}{How come yours don't smell but Sissie's do?
-Tim}

{18}{You can't spank it in the Taliban's presence.
-Mike}

{19}{If you want to be one of the guys, I can do it in front of you.
-Steve}

{20}{I'm drunk, it doesn't count!
-Steve}

{21}{They look dumb, and they *look* dumb.
-Tim}

{22}{He's the one who gave me my first heartbeat, and from then on I would schedule them on my own.
-Tim}

{23}{What's wrong with peoples' asses?
-Tim}

{24}{I was at home juggling with Cox.
-Steve}

{25}{And pop up the nice dialog that tells them to go fuck themselves.
-Steve}

{26}{Technically you need a cootchie to pop it, but you can improvise.
-Mike}

{27}{Now from a woman's perspective...does size really matter?
-Steve
Uh...size of what?
-Tiffany}

{28}{You get a doll and the first person you do voodoo on is me!? Go do voodoo on Leonard!!
-Tim}

{29}{Hey, don't sniff my box.
-Tim}

{30}{You can't call them and say "You fuckers! Fuck fuck fuck!"
-Tim}

{31}{I am the alpha dog. You will respect me.
-Mike}

{32}{Oh! Don't lick my pants.
-Tim}

{33}{You threw Cooter's paw on my crotch!
-Tim}

{34}{I don't know, the penis one sounded pretty good.
-Tim}

{35}{I just wanna be a 'ho'.
-Tim}

{36}{If we were at Macaroni Grill, I'd draw a cow on you.
-Steve}

{37}{It was a really strange combination of nudity, Star Wars and skateboarding.
-Steve}

{38}{I, Gonad of the North...
-Tim}

{39}{I'm not bending over for Walmart.
-Steve}

{40}{I was so excited I just whipped it out.
-Tim}

{41}{Why put off today what you can put off tomorrow?
-Craig}

{42}{A woman's ass, right.
-Huy}

{43}{I actually like being high.
-Tom}

{44}{Do you want me to touch you?
-Tim}

{45}{I think they throw bacon in there out of spite.
-Craig}

{46}{Jaunty cups for everyone!
-Huy}

{47}{I don't have time for anything unless it's oral.
-Steve}

{48}{I tried to jiggle it and see what I could do, but it didn't help.
-Tom}

{49}{No man love here.
-Huy}

{50}{He's pulling out the mystic wood.
-Steve}

{51}{I want to do gay.
-Tom}

{52}{Stabilize your weasel!
-Sean}

{53}{You made my balls move without any sound.
-Huy}

{54}{I have seen too many pictures of male strippers.
-Lucas}

{55}{Apparently I'm a big fan of stick-based meals.
-Sean}

{56}{I'm kinda like the Santa Claus of pants.
-Lucas}

{57}{Non-toxic just means you can stick it up your ass.
-Tim}

{58}{Aaron is trying to get rid of his little brown streak.
-Tim}

{59}{Death and evil? Those are great!
-Sean}

{60}{I just explode mess.
-Steve}

{61}{Awww! Fuck me in the goat ass!
-Steve}

{62}{Imagine if your woody looked like my nose.
-Aaron}

{63}{But when I bend over, it's bad.
-Aaron}

{64}{Electricity cannot be made thru poop.
-Tim}

{65}{I've got the best naked drawing dude story ever.
-Lucas}

{66}{Now I need to wash my hands before I can use my mouse again.
-Steve}

{67}{Anyone touches my prom queen and you'll get a severed body part!
-Tim}

{68}{Your tube is longer than mine...oh, it's jumbosize!
-Tim}

{69}{You can't be gay AND a pirate.
-Tom}

{70}{He said he's going to do it with six men and three or four women.
-Tom}

{71}{See? He just threw a floater back there.
-Aaron}

{72}{It gets hot under there because of my fiery loins.
-Huy}

{73}{I'm trying hard to get it up.
-Steve}

{74}{I need a big one. Huy's is too small.
-Steve}

{75}{Only Sean can roll the jellies!
-Huy}

{76}{I don't think there's anything that my balls don't destroy in one hit.
-Steve}

{77}{I'm just saying that you don't want to wear heels when going out with a gay pirate dentist.
-Aaron}

{78}{That's cheese! Everyone should have the same number of balls!
-Aaron}

{79}{In five years, I'm not going to remember how to get it up.
-Tim}

{80}{I'm dancing like your banana!
-Tom}

{81}{I'm just re-boning a tree.
-Corey}

{82}{I'm not smelling anything he hands me ever again.
-Lucas}

{83}{Lucas can whip it out in 2 seconds.
-Tim}

{84}{I don't care, Bryan, I'm not letting you lick it.
-Steve}

{85}{I am excited about my little tool, though.
-Aaron}

{86}{This ball is so small it's hard to hold it in your hand.
-Lucas}

{87}{What's going on? Are you a woman?
-Tom to Tim}

{88}{You guys are having a long two man adventure over there...
-Huy}

{89}{It's a move equivalent action to take it out.
-Sean}

{90}{You see a familiar bulge at his side.
-Sean}

{91}{They've all got to have the potential to be flaming!
-Sean}

{92}{I kinda wanted to get it up and see how it feels. I can always extend it later.
-Tim}

{93}{I want them both in my mouth, right NOW!
-Tim}

{94}{I've got it up over here if you want it.
-Huy}

{95}{He didn't look happy with the body, so I gave him the butt. And look how happy he is!
-Tom}

{96}{I'm putting it in slowly.
-Steve}

{97}{If someone tongues you, you shouldn't kill them while they are tonguing you.
-Mike}

{98}{Doesn't that smell like balls? Well, your tongue can't get in there!
-Steve}

{99}{Hey, that's my VD.
-Steve}

{100}{Do you know what's more fun than a dog with a ball? A dog with TWO balls!
-Tim}

{101}{You'd have to meet a sailor, and then he could teach you the ropes.
-Steve}

{102}{I could pull it out, play with it, and put it away.
-Aaron}

{103}{So, are we going to get together today, after lunch?
-Aaron}

{104}{My body is so good at filtering crap.
-Steve}

{105}{The hottest girl in barbarian land is *name withheld*.
-Peter}

{106}{It's so stiff on the other side.
-Aaron}

{107}{It's called the Answerer because it answers anyone who blows you.
-Tom}

{108}{I put my hand down and there's no smell.
-Tim}

{109}{This game is going to hit me over the head with a lead pipe and crush my skull with FUN FUN FUN
-User <jvn3t> during a chat at #rpgcodex}

{110}{When the mouse goes down on a button, it gets depressed.
-Steve}

{111}{What's that problem again? I was listening to Elton John.
-Huy}

{112}{Why does he only do women?
-Tim's mom}

{113}{My mom is NOT going in the quote file.
-Tim}

{114}{If you touched a bunch of other people, it'd be a problem.
-Aaron}

{115}{Steve says people's heads will explode when they see our lightning effect. Then they will piss and shit. They will be a piss and shit factory with no head. With this in mind, I have decided not to look at our lightning effect.
-Tom (in a weekly status report)}

{116}{You just want to ride around and play with it whenever you see it.
-Steve}

{117}{Because that's where the feminine position is, to the side and a little behind.
-Lee}

{118}{Aw, c'mon, from behind?!
-Peter}

{119}{There they are. I knew I'd written some functions that do things.
-Tim}

{120}{I'd rather just scratch my nuts and watch a movie.
-Steve}

{121}{There's a lot of naked women.
-Tim}

{122}{Who cares if you can get the dress off of them?
-Tim}

{123}{Somebody beat that, while I watch!
-Lee}

{124}{It's done. It just popped out at me!
-Tom}

{125}{I just wanted to say "urinal cake".
-Chris}

{126}{Let's go talk to him while he's in the bathroom.
-Aaron}

{127}{That's too long. I want it NOW!
-Huy}

{128}{Ooh, that's a hard one!
-Aaron}

{129}{Wait, don't block your hole!
-Lee}

{130}{Here's what we're gonna do... Lucas is gonna do the stick, and I'll do the rotate.
-Steve}

{131}{The weiner-mobile, now I like that.
-Tim}

{132}{Damn!  I took off his robe and he wasn't naked.
-Lee}

{133}{I call it the Sky Cock.
-Lucas}

{134}{And dead kitties is where I take a stand.
-Mary}

{135}{I got it up Lee. You wanna come see what's going on?
-Mike}

{136}{If you want me to bleed all over your car I can stick a straw in it.
-Steve}

{137}{Nookie for a thirteen year old should be OK.
-Tom}

{138}{Everytime I bust a big one, I just feel so happy.
-Mike}

{139}{Just so you know, I'm below a pig's ear.
-Tim}

{140}{I like the smallness.
-Mary}

{141}{I won't go through his drawers, but if it's out in the open, I'll grab it!
-Steve}

{142}{I think the best thing is to poop them when they blow up.
-McCarthy}

{143}{Wait, I don't have a finger in there.
-Tim}

{144}{Oh, look at the big one.
-Tom}

{145}{Do you want to smell my fingers?
-Tim}

{146}{You don't have to be THAT drunk, but it helps!
-Tim}

{147}{The great thing is half the time he doesn't need anyone to provide ball movement for him. He just can't keep it in his mouth.
-Bryan}

{148}{Jesus Christ came out great!
-Steve}

{149}{Fuck, I was pulling down as fast as I could. I mean, where the fuck was my red?
-Bryan}

{150}{I can eat any nuts.
-Corey}

{151}{Whoah, what's all this water doing in here?
-Tim}

{152}{I'm just reading your incompetence.
-Juan}

{153}{I'm a one girl kind of woman.
-Aaron}

{154}{I'm not gonna be the GUY!
-Steve}

{155}{I saw the best show on sperm.
-Mike}

{156}{I've been pulling it out every day this week and I'm just tired of pulling it in and out.
-Tim}

{157}{Good grief, you made me write a V.
-Mary}

{158}{Oh, I was scared of your juice.
-Aaron}

{159}{It's endless hours of entertainment, with legs!
-Steve}

{160}{Your ass does not entertain me.
-Steve}

{161}{Wiping is not in my job description.
-Huy}

{162}{What do you think that is floating in there?
-Tim}

{163}{Oh, I see what happened. Lucas's thingy fell off.
-Steve}

{164}{There are diseases in your ass that make sure you digest better.
-Steve}

{165}{Yeah, that definitely needs to come off.
-Aaron}

{166}{Don't look, just bite.
-Steve}

{167}{I'm having some problems with some functions.
-Aaron}

{168}{Would you stop showing me your 6 millimeter piece?!
-Tim to Aaron}

{169}{I guess there's no reason to be sober anymore.
-Craig}

 

Hey, are there voice files to go with these? I got an idea for a new mod. Now I can finally contribute something besides my intelligent gluteal insights!

#12 - Do both. Then get a postion teaching math at the university level. Maybe then the students will keep their eyes on the figures on the board. (Ouch! It REALLY hurt to type that.)

After reading a few of these, I wonder if there's a "Hot Coffee" version of ToEE hidden somewhere in the code. I bet this is going to blow those other E-mail scandals right off the front page...Of the newspaper... You know those things people used to read to get the news...Sigh, never mind.

Great Find, K/2!

 

No offense intended, but i laughed lñike idiot with THIS... oh wait...i always laugh like idiot :grin: