Wish corruptor

Granted.
You get home from work to discover that a battery shipping truck has carened wildly out of control and smashed through your living room wall. Rather than paying for damages the company just tells you to keep the batteries.

I wish that my favourite authors couldn't die and were compelled to continue writing thruout their eternal lives.

Cuchulainn.

 

Granted. As the years and years of continuing work drone on, the authors eventually run out of ideas so horribly mundane, boring, and outright AWFUL that you try to kill them to no avail. So, rather than wasting the rest of your life trying to avoid said stories, you are compelled to kill yourself instead.

I wish I wouldn't get hungry so often. I mean, I still stay thin no matter how much I eat, but I eat an awful lot... expensive...

 

granted, you are now a borg.

I wish this crap weather would clear up.

 

Granted, but the fish lives on to file a charge of attempted murder. Due to the recent pollution of the world's oceans, the fish wins through a strong sympathy vote and you are promptly given a bizarre haircut. The fish proceeds to be eaten by the jury, though you are offered none.

I wish professional musicians would make more mistakes during their performances.

 

granted, you name him Oedipus.

I wish I had a life time supply of candy bars.

 

Granted.

But due to a limited suply of candy bars, we had to shorten your lifespan to the next 4 hours.

I wish I hadn't forgoten to properly secure the oil cap last time I did routine maintanence on our backup generator. :blush:

Cuchulainn.

 

Granted, but while you secured the oil cap, you were electrocuted into a 30 year coma while attempting to start it.

I wish the waves in Maui will be perfect 8 foot barrels for my next trip.

 

Granted, but, after falling asleep Christmas Eve, you awake in August. Your family is too kind to correct you, and Christmas is celebrated as usual. They also compliment you misleadingly on the bizarre haircut you received prior, which has grown to monstrous proportions.

I wish I could concentrate better on work.

 

Granted. You can now concentrate on work with your whole being. Unfortunately, you can now do nothing but concentrate on work, leaving no room for other things, like other people, food, sleep, and even personal hygiene.

I wish people posting in this thread would corrupt the actual wish the previous poster had made, rather than going off on some wild, non-sequitur tangent.

 

I was just tying into the wish I had granted to him previously, for continuity or whatsit.

Sorry about that. :mrhappy:

 

Granted, he just did corrupt your wish.

I wish I were a better student.

 

Granted.
You are now such a good student that you stay in school for years and years. When you finaly graduate with doctorates in Art, Political Science, and Comparitive Religion, you get a job at McDonalds and begin the 80 year process of paying off you're student loans.

I wish I could communicate telepathicly with my computer.

Cuchulainn.