Relationship Rant Thread

I see subtility is wasted on most of you...or maybe y'all just chose to ignore it. I was mostly referring to running away to Gaear's. Sort of making a pun out of it. For the fun of it. (Often when I am trying to be clever, my "message" is in layers. And often, nobody gets it but me. Sigh. I am better at clanging.)

It is hard to bail on someone you've been close to for 14 years. Especially when children are involved. I think Emirkol has some good advice. So does Gaear. But then, this is a rant thread. Ranting, by definition, usually excludes advice.

Do let us know the consequences...er...the outcome.

 

GA82, had a bit of a brainstorm.

Is C currently involved in a relationship? If not, she could be lonely and looking to you. She may even be jealous of the relationship you have with A. In either case, be careful. If she is looking to you, she knows she has an advantage as A does not see her as a threat, due to her being an "avowed" lesbian. It's like a secret back door. (Please< no puns!)

In either case, it's not about the sexual orientations, but rather the sanctity of the friendship. Anyone is hard pressed in life to have any "true" friends that have been friends for multiple years. Everyone has lots of "friends" who are really aquaintences, but few of us have "true" friends. You're one of the lucky ones, GA82.

I think you might be looking at a sit-down with C, if your fears/concerns/etc aren't alleviated by some other means.

 

Most of you guys have touched on the kinds of things I've been worried about. So I think my worries are not groundless. C is just a friend (14 years). but she's been acting wierd lately. That's kind of what I was seeking advice about. She is presently in a relationship of some sort with H, who just recently left her boyfriend. So I don't think she's lonely.

I've known A for 7 years, but she's really a friend of my ex. I've only been going with her for less than a year. I wonder if I'm insurance against going back to her ex. Or a bay-sitter who's paid the "fun" way.

A and C have never met and don't seem interested in doing so. I just spent the day with A. I see C once or twice a week, and it usually involves yoga, karate, weight training or running and lunch. Neither of these people are hotties because they are young.

But, I think you guys have a point. If it all blows up in my face, I'll be sure to give you guys the chance to give me the horse laugh.

(Actually, it's more like juggling wildcats. Ever try to throw a cat?)

 

Been there, done that, got the scars. I don't get crushed by ruptured expectations like I used to. I knew A was a dangerous job when I took it. I saw how she handled her ex. So I've already decided not to be bitter about it if I get dumped. I think this means that I keep one foot out the door emotionally. And the bad thing about being a nice guy when that occurs is that they sometimes want to come back. At least I get to spend extra time with the squawky girls. :joy:

Today's Smart Tip from a Dumb Ass:

Watch how your lover treats the waiter. Later, you won't have it as good as that.

 

Outstanding question! I love to go all out and let let the pieces fall where they may. I LOVE roller coasters. But...

There are other people who own a piece of me, and I cannot let them down, my son for example. Honestly, they are more important to me than A. A has similar relationships. In fact, I may be in the picture only because of my relationship with her daughters, who I've known from birth.

Another thing is the headless corpse of the previous rider...

P.S. Reality check. There are ALWAYS conditions on love. ANY relationship can be broken. Everyone has a limit.

 

Why yes, just the other day. Ranged about 50 yards with the first throw, but missed the target. (neighbor's dog). Yet another New Year's resolution to work on, improving my aim in cat throwing.

 

You've never thrown a cat.

 

Yeah, you're right. If I did, the wife would kill me. She loves cats, as do I, though I prefer the unconditional love and companionship of dogs.

I have sling-shotted stoats before, though.

 

CATapult. :thumbsup:

Before someone asks: When I was a single digit age, I was dropping a cat onto the bed, from various heights, to see if he would always land on his feet. The answer is: Always.

Mr. Kitty was getting tired of this when I decided to try this from across the room. I cradled the kitty, gently swung both arms, released...

I learned a LOT that day.

 

Unconditional is an absolute, which makes it false. That may be cynicism. But there has to be recognition that there is nothing that is absolutely valuable. Value, as a concept, is inherently relative.

If one partner disrespects the relationship enough, the other will eventually give it up, no matter how committed they were. What I worry about is what happens before that point. Screwing up a child? Severe injury? Irrecoverable emotional trauma? Death?

To avoid the rollercoaster is to avoid love. If you love someone, you're going to get hurt when they get hurt. But, you're there to help, which makes the pain less for both of you.

Don't think I get involved with people only because they are attractive, that doesn't attract my attention long enough. I don't get involved with someone because it will be a wild ride. But, I do get involved knowing it will be a wild ride, which might be the same thing.

When you love someone, what exactly are you giving up? Your time. The rest is replaceable. You can't love only on the condition that it's unconditional.