Two Things You Don't Do Well

Sirchet, you are correct. To preserve your life and limb, avoid the problem.

Don't physically confront violent criminals. There's no such thing as "winning" a fight because it's not a contest. Self-defense is simply whether or not you are hurt. The condition of the "other guy" is irrelevant because they are of no significance: cockroaches.

I know this is not the way Guardian Angels do things, but our preferred method of stopping an already violent situation is for the perp to realize we are there a few seconds after they are jammed up against a wall or pinned to the pavement. We can do this because we have numbers, training, experience and often, surprise. Surprise because they wouldn't do anything if they knew we were there.

When I'm alone or with family, I get back and call the police, same as everyone else.

Self-defense is rarely what somebody selling something says it is.

 

Two things I am awful at:

Having patience when my time is being wasted. Necessary waits are fine.

Lying. It's too much work and I don't care that much.

 

This is so obvious, I am starting to think you consider me dumb. Of course, it is the best way.

Unfortunately, one can not ALWAYS choose a "smart" way, because mentioned cockroaches may behave irrationally.

When I will be a high-ranking official and lowlife mobbers will come to "arrest" me during some outside-inspired unrest, I'll need all my defensive skills - shooting from assault rifle, slicing with a knife, stabbing with a dirk, breaking skulls with a pipe, killing people with bare hands, running fast etc. Because I do not think police will help in that situation.

Oh, and all this is not actually related to me buying something, it is related to African disturbances. Because indeed, such events made me think about what will I do and where will I be... And what skills I will need.

 

Старушка входит в переполненный автобус с пакетом и громко говорит:
"Осторожно, мужики, не поколите яйца!"
Ей, естественно, отвечают: "Бабуля, зачем же ты в переполненный автобус с яйцами полезла?!"
"Так я-то не с яйцами, я с гвоздями!"

So, I think this joke uses two words - "яйца" (means eggs and also used for certain body parts of a man) and "колоть" (means both "break" and "stab"); kind of a language-specific humour.

And what was the reason for me getting a dirk? I think it was totally irrational desire to have a shiny pointy thing in a black leather and golden metal scabbard, no?

 

Me? No, I am too dangerous to permit me do that, ha-ha-ha, but various Caucasian tribesmen are allowed to, because that is "a part of their national costume".
<Well, do not consider this a hate comment, explanation follows.>

Seriously, there is a definition of a "cold weapon" in the law, and if a knife in question does NOT fall under this definition (like the mentioned dirk), one can (presumably) carry it around. Well, I think if I were to carry it into Kremlin or any cinema with metal detectors, I'd be stopped despite having a certificate stating it is not a cold weapon.

If it falls under definition, one has to obtain a permission to HAVE it (being a hunter, or being of the ethnicity which has cold weapons as part of national costume is a reason for authorities to give such a permission, maybe there are other reasons, I do not remember, been a long time since I've read the law).

Of course, all these laws, they are only good when applied to loyal citizens (like me). I mean, when whole republics of the Russian Federation are filled with people having illegitimate assault rifles hanging in their rooms openly, who would care about people wielding knifes in the street after nightfall?

 

Sergi, what you said about having a plan is GREAT self-defense. Look at the things that may happen to you, and plan what to do about them. That way, you will act instead of dithering while things happen to you.

People don't need to fight off 3 armed attackers in an alley, just stay out of the alley. You are more likely to be accosted in a store parking lot or after leaving a restaurant, or, more likely, a bar. If there are people hanging out there, go elsewhere.

 

I was thinking of the desire part, just because you want to and you'll feel satisfied having the skill. I don't think every thing everybody does has to be logical

 

I agree.

I have these for no reason other than I think they are really really cool and I like them!!